George Carlin on New Orleans

Posted: October 12th, 2005 by Militant Libertarian

I got this via email today. I don’t know if it’s actually from George Carlin (it’s probably not), but who cares? It’s the truth.

“Been sitting here with my ass in a wad, wanting to speak out about the
bullshit going on in New Orleans. For the people of New Orleans… First we
would like to say, Sorry for your loss. With that said, Let’s go through a
few hurricane rules: (Unlike an earthquake, we know it’s coming)

#1. A mandatory evacuation means just that…Get the hell out. Don’t blame
the Government after they tell you to go. If they hadn’t said anything, I
can see the argument. They said get out… if you didn’t, it’s your fault,
not theirs. (We don’t want to hear it, even if you don’t have a car, you
can get out.)

#2. If there is an emergency, stock up on water and non-perishables. If you
didn’t do this, it’s not the Government’s fault you’re starving.

#2a. If you run out of food and water, find a store that has some.
(Remember, shoes, TV’s, DVD’s and CD’s are not edible. Leave them alone.)

#2b. If the local store has been looted of food or water, leave your
neighbor’s TV and stereo alone. (See #2a) They worked hard to get their
stuff. Just because they were smart enough to leave during a mandatory
evacuation, doesn’t give you the right to take their stuff…it’s theirs,
not yours.

#3. If someone comes in to help you, don’t shoot at them and then complain
no one is helping you. I’m not getting shot to help save some dumbass who
didn’t leave when told to do so.

#4. If you are in your house that is completely under water, your belongings
are probably too far gone for anyone to want them. If someone does want
them, let them have them and hopefully they’ll die in the filth. Just
leave! (It’s New Orleans, find a voodoo warrior and put a curse on them.)

#5. My tax money should not pay to rebuild a 2 million dollar house, a
sports stadium or a floating casino. Also, my tax money shouldn’t go to
rebuild a city that is under sea level. You wouldn’t build your house on
quicksand would you? You want to live below sea-level, do your country some
good and join the Navy.

#6. Regardless of what the Poverty Pimps Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton want
you to believe, The US Government didn’t create the Hurricane as a way to
eradicate the black people of New Orleans; (Neither did Russia as a way to
destroy America). The US Government didn’t cause global warming that caused
the hurricane (We’ve been coming out of an ice age for over a million

#7. The government isn’t responsible for giving you anything. This is the
land of the free and the home of the brave, but you gotta work for what you
want. McDonalds and Wal-Mart are always hiring, get a damn job and stop
spooning off the people who are actually working for a living. President
Kennedy said it best…”Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what
you can do for your country.”

Thank you for allowing me to rant.

Got comments? Email me, dammit!
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