Militant Rants

Vent Your Spleen and WIN

It’s been a very long time since I did any kind of giveaway or contest here on Militant Libertarian.  Years, I think.  Our good friend Michael W. Dean over at LibertarianPunk has sent me a stack of Right Arm of Wyoming CDs.  My instructions?  Find homes for them.

So here’s what we’re going to do.

You are going to rant and rave, vent your spleen, absolve your psyche, bitch about your troubles, take it to the Man, flip the bird to the Elites, tell the Washington power brokers where to shove it, all that good stuff. I return, I’ll send you one of these CDs.

Write your own Militant Rant that I can publish here.  There are some rules (not many, but this has to be at least a little honest) to follow, but you are free to carry on about anything you’d like, provided it fits within the spirit of the Militant Libertarian.  That’s a fancy way of saying it needs to be vaguely political.

This CD is awesome and you need one.  It’s got a jacket, a disc, a lyrics sheet, a picture of someone shooting stuff, a lucky 13 roundup of songs, and more! 

To get your CD, you can rant about the right, the left, the right-left, the underground, the above ground, the Elitist NWO Power Mongers, the anarchists who want no mongering, the Palin-worshippers, the Palin-haters, the Alex Jones conspiracy nuts, the head-in-the-sand mainstreamers..  whatever you think you need to bitch about.

The first twelve people to do it will get a FREE CD. That’s right!  ABSOLUTELY, POSITIVELY, COMPLETELY FREE.*

Here’s the official rules:

  1. Contest is first-come, first-served so if you’re entrant #13.. SOL
  2. Each rant will be published once daily until the end of the month.
  3. Rants must be a minimum of 300 words and no more than 1,200 words.
  4. Rants must be at least 90% English and more or less grammatically correct.
  5. One entrant per person, please, and each entrant must be at least 16 years of age.
  6. No entries from Hillary Clinton, Al Gore, the Reverend Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, Joe Biden, Rosie O’donnell, Tito Jackson, or anyone named after any Egyptian symbols will be accepted.
  7. Rant must not incite violence, use racial slurs, or contain the phrase “gin rummy.”
  8. Rant may not contain more than 100 swear words or swear words in a ratio of more than 1:3, whichever is greater.
  9. Rant must contain contact information for verification (email preferred).
  10. I reserve the right to decline any rant for any reason and to hold future giveaways if I figure out that I have more CDs than I thought.

Here’s another little surprise I’m throwing at you.  I hinted at it in #10 there.. I might have more than a dozen CDs.  I’m not sure, I didn’t count.  That requires, like, math and stuff.  Right now, there are as many CDs as I have fingers, plus a couple, so I know there’s at least 12 of them. Winning rants will be published until the end of the month!

Here’s how to enter:

Create a login (unless you already have one) by clicking the link to the right under “Login.”  Then choose “Posts” and “Add New” to begin writing.  Make sure to hit “save” when you’re done!

Alternatively, you can email your rant to me if you’d like, but rants posted directly to the site will be given preference in terms of the time received.

However you send it to me, include a name and postal address (this will not be published) to send your CD to.  I will ship them anywhere that is within reason.

*Free except for that fact that you have to slave over your keyboard and pump out at least 300 words in a rant that is at least mostly coherent and only contains a maximum of 100 swear words (or less). Trust me, harder than it sounds.  You won’t be making minimum wage on this deal..