Militant Rants

Crocodile Brings Down a Plane

I saw the following on News From the Perimeter:

KINSHASA (CONGO) – A Crocodile hidden in a  large duffel bag brought down a a Fil-air flight on August 25 from the province of Bandundu, Democratic Republic of Congo. After an investigation of the incident, the Daily Telegraph reporters have now verified that it was in fact a Crocodile that was hidden in a large sports bag by a man who wanted to sell it illegally. It thenescaped and created a panic among the passengers first, and then into the cabin of the plane. Among the twenty aboard only two survived the crash. One of the passengers who survived, who reconstruct the incident for investigators, said he protected himself with a machete.

I had two reactions.  My immediate reaction was to say “Hey!  They let them have machetes on an airplane!  I can’t even take my damned tweezers!

My next reaction was to wonder why this jackass smuggling a crocodile onto an airplane (How the hell do you get this loaded into luggage without someone noticing?) was to wonder why he hadn’t drugged it up first.  I mean, at least pour a bottle of vodka or something down its throat and get the thing loopy.  Give it a couple of bong hits.  Something to daze the thing for the flight.

No tape on its mouth and feet?  How the hell did this genius capture a crocodile if he’s so stupid he can’t figure out how to ship it. Doesn’t the Congo have FedEx?

Now, back to that guy protecting himself with a machete.  Why the hell can’t I have a damn pocket knife on my plane, but over there in the Congo they’re allowed crocodiles and machetes and who knows what else?  This would also imply that they don’t have naked body scanners, metal detectors, croc-sniffing dogs, etc. in the Congo either.

Somebody better tell Hillary and Pelosi and crew that the world is being racist against Congolese, not doing anything to keep them safe from terrorists.  I mean, comon..  If it saves just one crocodile smuggler it’s got to be worth it!  Send them some naked body scanners and a handful of TSA professionals!  It’s not like we don’t have them to spare…