Ode to Traffic Cops

Posted: January 25th, 2011 by Militant Libertarian

by Milo Nickels, FCR

The other day I was driving home, just minding my own business, when I passed by a cop sitting on the side of the road–running radar.  I had that natural, automatic reaction, where I glanced down anxiously at my speedometer to make sure I wasn’t accidentally going a little faster than I intended.  Then, the cop pulled out behind me.  As I watched him in my rear view mirror, I became a little more anxious.  Is he running my plate?  Was my inspection sticker the wrong color?  Could he tell I wasn’t wearing my seatbelt?  Was my plate lamp out?  Did I do something wrong?  Fortunately, he only followed me a few blocks before he turned onto another street without pulling me over–presumably on his way to buy donuts or beat up a minority.

Once my anxiety subsided and I realized that I had safely gotten away with driving past a cop, I immediately became angry that I had to feel anxious in the first place.  It makes me sick that the people who are supposed to be protecting and serving us, funded by our tax money, are lining themselves up along roadsides to extract more money from us.  Police couldn’t care less about biting the hand that feeds them–it’s not like we can refuse to pay them because we don’t like how they operate.  They’ve become cash registers with badges (and guns)–a puzzling combination of mafia henchmen, vampires, boy scouts, and the fat kid in high school who thought he was cool because he played football.  Anyhow…  when I got home that night I was still thinking about it, and continued to do so as I was falling asleep.  Then it hit me…  I’ll write a poem about it!  Enjoy, this rare masterpiece!!!  (Just to be extra-sarcastic I’m going to format it to look really special–like a real poem)

Ode to traffic cops
by Milo Nickels
Cop with a radar gun
hidden from view
not hunting for bad guys,
but gunning for you.

They demand your licenses,
and your registrations.
They aren’t there to protect,
but to serve you citations.

They won’t come if you’re robbed;
They’ve stopped fighting crime.
But, if your headlight is out,
you’ll get stopped every time.

There once was a time
when police were respected,
when they defended our rights,
and we felt protected.

But, how do you feel now,
when you drive past a cop?
do you feel safe and sound,
or fear you’ll be stopped?

Investigator, officer,
detective, inspector.
You’re no longer a hero,
but a levy collector.

You ignore the constitution
and the oath that you swore.
The state is a pimp,
and you are its whore.

-MN

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Comments (3)

 

  1. Paul Turner says:

    This past summer I was walking to a local park to take some photos. A police cruiser went passed me, turned at the next corner and stopped. When I got to the corner, I was questioned about my destination and what I needed a camera for. I lived in a fairly small town and this was pretty uncomfortable. I asked if this was usual to be stopping people like this. He said we have to be pretty careful since the 9/11 thing. Paul Turner

    • Hi Paul,

      Next time please be better prepared to hand the looters, bureaucrats, enforcers, and mercenaries their pink-slips in the distinct and most-excellent form of Tom Baugh’s book Starving The Monkeys!

      Of course most of them will refuse it outright and some will even disengage and run away from you if they have the chance.

      Sure you see Ron Paul, John Stossel, Lew Rockwell, and others mentioning Ayn Rand’s book Atlas Shrugged but you won’t see them mentioning Tom Baugh’s book Starving The Monkeys. Everyone should ask themselves why…when these folks and many more have been given a copy personally.

      Starving The Monkeys and Ending The Looterfest,
      John and Dagny Galt
      Starving The Monkeys, Owners Manual For The Universe!(tm)

      .

  2. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Punk Johnny Cash and Punk Johnny Cash, Aaron Turpen. Aaron Turpen said: New post: Ode to Traffic Cops (http://militantlibertarian.org/?p=14697) http://militantlibertarian.org/?p=14697 […]

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